Content

"Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content."
-Philippians 4:11

Most days I want more than I have. It's something that I continuously struggle with.

A bigger house. A beautiful kitchen filled with state of the art appliances and gourmet ingredients. Another baby. Another car. A better wardrobe. Life would be better, easier if I had these things. I would be happier if I had these things.

At least that's what I tell myself.

I've spent a lot of time over the past few weeks thinking about the things I have vs. the things I want, and the things I want vs. the things I need.

When we were first married accumulating things was a necessity. As a brand new family it was part of building our home. All of a sudden we needed couches, a bed, pots and pans. Only a few nights of eating dinner off of a cardboard box convinced us that we needed a kitchen table and chairs. Luckily our wedding presents fulfilled most of these needs but not all of them. I remember one Sunday I was getting ready to make mashed potatoes and realized that I didn't have a vegetable peeler. One week I made a bread recipe that yielded two loaves and only had one bread pan. Like most newly married couples, we spent the next few years realizing what we had a need for and then fulfilling that need.

After almost 6 years of marriage we now have everything needed for day to day life and then some. I have a vegetable peeler. And a potato masher, and a zester. I have two bread pans. And a bundt pan, and an angel food cake pan. A year ago we lived in a very nice, very big (to us) house afforded to us by Justin's salary at the Idaho Statesman. We loved and got used to the space. Because we had the room, we accumulated extra things. Things for Justin's den: pictures, a desk, chairs. Things for my laundry room: fabric, sewing supplies. Things for my cooking: extra pans, beautiful serving pieces, a collection of white dishes.

Then, a month ago, as we prepared to move into a condo half the size of our house, I went and stood in my pantry and looked around. I looked at all the food, all the craft supplies, all the beautiful glasses and dishes that I'd carefully collected. And I wondered where I was going to put it all. I realized that some of it had to go. No, not some of it, most of it. There was no space in the new house for things that weren't used regularly. The boxes full of things that we reluctantly donated to charity were almost as numerous as the boxes that came with us.

We kept only what was necessary.

And- I don't miss much. As we live here in this tiny condo I find myself being more thankful than I have in a while. For small things. For birds singing and leaves changing color on my morning runs. For the eyes and ears that I have to experience those things. For a healthy, capable body. For a kind, thoughtful husband who loves me no matter what and a happy, busy daughter to keep me busy. For the gospel that enriches my life so much, for the opportunity to serve. It seems that my thoughts are an almost continuous hymn of thankfulness to my Heavenly Father and that surprises me a little. Maybe it's because we've been on loose, sliding ground for so long and now finally are finding our footing. Maybe it's because I really do feel our actions being guided by a larger, all-seeing force. Maybe it's because we're rebuilding, and on a more sure foundation than we had built before.

Maybe it's because it's true that the most important things in life aren't things.

Together Forever

written 3/08/09

"The sealing ordinance is the capstone ordinance in the Church, and its blessings are present in this life as well as in the next. As President Joseph Fielding Smith (1876–1972) declared, children who are born in the covenant—and, by extension, those who are sealed to their parents in the temple—“have claims upon the blessings of the gospel beyond what those not so born are entitled to receive. They may receive a greater guidance, a greater protection, a greater inspiration from the Spirit of the Lord; and then there is no power that can take them away from their parents.”

In having Audrey become a member of our family there have been many memorable dates: the day we met her for the first time- July 8, 2007. The day she came home- August 4, 2007. The day her adoption was finalized and we officially beame a family- February 11, 2008. But the most important date in our eyes is last Saturday March 1, 2008 when we were sealed to her for time and all eternity in the temple. As Justin and I sat together waiting to go into the sealing room I couldn't stop crying, I felt so blessed that this was really happening, that we were able to seal this beautiful happy baby girl to us, that we'd be her mother and father forever. It was a beautiful ceremony. The spirit there was so strong. We were so happy to have all our family there, the room was so filled with love. And now it's as if we can breath a huge sigh of relief: she's ours. Forever. As the quote above says there is no power that can take her away from us now.

The blessing the next day was also a very spiritual experience. Justin did such a good job and gave me the best compliment that he ever could, he blessed Audrey to be like her mother. He was so sweet and tender as he blessed her, what a lovely moment for our family! Later in sacrament meeting my Mom bore such a kind, powerful testimony about our family. I can't even express how much that meant to me.

Afterward we went to the Harrison Plaza Suites Hotel for a small luncheon. And as the many, many photos illustrate we had a lot of good food and a great time visiting with family and enjoying being together. We want to thank everyone who was there for either the sealing or the blessing or both, we really appreciate you coming. We've also received many kind words from family members who wanted to be there but weren't able to and we're thankful for you as well.

Our house is returning back to normal, we've eaten left over sandwiches and salads and cakes for a week now and we celebrated Justin's birthday on Friday- 28 years old!

Thank you again to everyone who has helped us on this journey of becoming a family of three. Everything has gone so smoothly and quickly that we know Audrey is meant to be here, we know Heavenly Father meant for us to be a family. And we know that Families can be Together Forever.

Favorite Moments In My Life Right Now

written 6/08/08

When Justin gets home from work. I'm usually in the kitchen working on dinner, he comes in and talks to me for a few minutes then picks up Audrey and heads upstairs to change out of his suit. From the kitchen I hear Audrey yell "deedle deedle da!" and then Justin yells back "deedle deedle da!" and she giggles. Her little voice- "da da sha ra!" and then he answers "da da sha ra!" more giggling. This is a game that can go on for quite awhile and I can picture them both- Audrey sitting on the bed while Justin hangs up his tie...It always makes me laugh while I'm cooking.

When we get home from church. We walk in the door and I kick off my heels while Justin loosens his tie. The house is still mostly clean from when I cleaned it on Friday and there's cold soda waiting for us in the fridge. We change into comfortable clothes and put Audrey down for a nap then work on dinner together. I love the feeling of knowing that there isn't anything that has to be done, that we can just relax together and read the newspaper or take a drive or go on a walk.

Miss A's Birthday

I can't wax nostalgic about the day that Audrey was born like so many other mothers do on their children's birthday.

I can't, because I wasn't there.

I don't know what I was doing on May 7, 2007. Probably everyday mundane tasks like making phone calls or grocery shopping. I'd like to say that at 7:20 pm I paused in whatever I was doing- that as Audrey was taking her first breath and seeing the world for the first time that I had some sort of premonition that my daughter had just been born.

But I didn't.

On May 7, 2007 I had no idea that my life would soon change forever because a beautiful baby girl had just been born in a hospital in another state. I had no idea that my dream of being a mother would soon be a reality.

It kills me a little bit each time I think that I missed out on such a hugely important day in my daughter's life. That I wasn't there to hold her or kiss her, to gaze into her eyes in her first few moments. But these thoughts are always quickly followed by an overwhelming gratitude to the woman who did give her birth. The brave woman who gave Audrey life, and then selflessly gave me the opportunity to be a Mother. Thank you Megan. Thank you so much.

I wasn't there that day, but I am here now, to celebrate the second anniversary of the day that this special little girl was born and blessed not one, but two families. Everytime she looks at me with those big eyes and smiles or calls me Mama I have to pinch myself to make sure that she's really here, that she's really mine. She's the greatest miracle in my life and I love her so much.

Happy Birthday Audrey

love, Mom

Last night I was in a mood. A mood to get out of the house and shop for something fun, something just for myself. I wanted to go out and be able to take my time to browse and peruse, and not have to hurry, or have flat hair and a stained shirt and a baby on my hip.

I told Justin and he was fine with it. (I have such a patient husband)

So, I put Audrey to bed a little early, fluffed my hair, transferred my wallet and car keys from the diaper bag to my purse, kissed Justin and flew out the door. I was on a mission. No kids, no spilling sippy cups, no rushing. Just me, cute spring clothes and my debit card.

Once at the store sans baby and husband and using an actual purse like a regular person I browsed and perused. I even tried a few things on, but didn't find a single thing that was just right.

Until I found myself in the kids section. I spent the rest of the night shopping for Audrey.

I am a Mom. Even when I try not to be.

Infertility Etiquette
By Vita Alligood

Chances are, you know someone who is struggling with infertility. More than five million people of childbearing age in the United States experience infertility. Yet, as a society, we are woefully uninformed about how to best provide emotional support for our loved ones during this painful time.

Infertility is, indeed, a very painful struggle. The pain is similar to the grief over losing a loved one, but it is unique because it is a recurring grief. When a loved one dies, he isn't coming back. There is no hope that he will come back from the dead. You must work through the stages of grief, accept that you will never see this person again, and move on with your life.

The grief of infertility is not so cut and dry. Infertile people grieve the loss of the baby that they may never know. They grieve the loss of that baby who would have had mommy's nose and daddy's eyes. But, each month, there is the hope that maybe that baby will be conceived after all. No matter how hard they try to prepare themselves for bad news, they still hope that this month will be different. Then, the bad news comes again, and the grief washes over the infertile couple anew. This process happens month after month, year after year. It is like having a deep cut that keeps getting opened right when it starts to heal.

As the couple moves into infertility treatments, the pain increases while the bank account depletes. Most infertility treatments involve using hormones, which alter the user's moods. (That statement is like calling a lion a cat-my husband would tell you that the side effect is insanity!) The tests are invasive and embarrassing to both parties, and you feel like the doctor has taken over your bedroom. And for all of this discomfort, you pay a lot of money. Infertility treatments are expensive, and most insurance companies do not cover the costs. So, in addition to the pain of not conceiving a baby each month, the couple pays out anywhere from $300 to five figures, depending upon the treatment used.

A couple will eventually resolve the infertility problem in one of three ways:
They will eventually conceive a baby.
They will stop the infertility treatments and choose to live without children.
They will find an alternative way to parent, such as by adopting a child or becoming a foster parent.

Reaching a resolution can take years, so your infertile loved ones need your emotional support during this journey. Most people don't know what to say, so they wind up saying the wrong thing, which only makes the journey so much harder for their loved ones. Knowing what not to say is half of the battle to providing support.

Don't Tell Them to Relax
Everyone knows someone who had trouble conceiving but then finally became pregnant once she "relaxed." Couples who are able to conceive after a few months of "relaxing" are not infertile. By definition, a couple is not diagnosed as "infertile" until they have tried unsuccessfully to become pregnant for a full year. In fact, most infertility specialists will not treat a couple for infertility until they have tried to become pregnant for a year. This year weeds out the people who aren't infertile but just need to "relax." Those that remain are truly infertile.
Comments such as "just relax" or "try going on a cruise" create even more stress for the infertile couple, particularly the woman. The woman feels like she is doing something wrong when, in fact, there is a good chance that there is a physical problem preventing her from becoming pregnant. These comments can also reach the point of absurdity. As a couple, my husband and I underwent two surgeries, numerous inseminations, hormone treatments, and four years of poking and prodding by doctors. Yet, people still continued to say things like, "If you just relaxed on a cruise . . ." Infertility is a diagnosable medical problem that must be treated by a doctor, and even with treatment, many couples will NEVER successfully conceive a child. Relaxation itself does not cure medical infertility.

Don't Minimize the Problem
Failure to conceive a baby is a very painful journey. Infertile couples are surrounded by families with children. These couples watch their friends give birth to two or three children, and they watch those children grow while the couple goes home to the silence of an empty house. These couples see all of the joy that a child brings into someone's life, and they feel the emptiness of not being able to experience the same joy.
Comments like, "Just enjoy being able to sleep late . . . .travel . . etc.," do not offer comfort. Instead, these comments make infertile people feel like you are minimizing their pain. You wouldn't tell somebody whose parent just died to be thankful that he no longer has to buy Father's Day or Mother's Day cards. Losing that one obligation doesn't even begin to compensate for the incredible loss of losing a parent. In the same vein, being able to sleep late or travel does not provide comfort to somebody who desperately wants a child.

Don't Say There Are Worse Things That Could Happen
Along the same lines, don't tell your friend that there are worse things that she could be going through. Who is the final authority on what is the "worst" thing that could happen to someone? Is it going through a divorce? Watching a loved one die? Getting raped? Losing a job?
Different people react to different life experiences in different ways. To someone who has trained his whole life for the Olympics, the "worst" thing might be experiencing an injury the week before the event. To someone who has walked away from her career to become a stay-at-home wife for 40 years, watching her husband leave her for a younger woman might be the "worst" thing. And, to a woman whose sole goal in life has been to love and nurture a child, infertility may indeed be the "worst" thing that could happen.
People wouldn't dream of telling someone whose parent just died, "It could be worse: both of your parents could be dead." Such a comment would be considered cruel rather than comforting. In the same vein, don't tell your friend that she could be going through worse things than infertility.

Don't Say They Aren't Meant to Be Parents
One of the cruelest things anyone ever said to me is, "Maybe God doesn't intend for you to be a mother." How incredibly insensitive to imply that I would be such a bad mother that God felt the need to divinely sterilize me. If God were in the business of divinely sterilizing women, don't you think he would prevent the pregnancies that end in abortions? Or wouldn't he sterilize the women who wind up neglecting and abusing their children? Even if you aren't religious, the "maybe it's not meant to be" comments are not comforting. Infertility is a medical condition, not a punishment from God or Mother Nature.

Don't Ask Why They Aren't Trying IVF
In vitro fertilization (IVF) is a method in which the woman harvests multiple eggs, which are then combined with the man's sperm in a petri dish. This is the method that can produce multiple births. People frequently ask, "Why don't you just try IVF?" in the same casual tone they would use to ask, "Why don't you try shopping at another store?"
There are many reasons why a couple would choose not to pursue this option. Here are a few of them.
IVF is Expensive with Low Odds.
One cycle of IVF is very expensive. With all of the hype in the news, many people assume that IVF is a sure thing when, in fact, the odds of success for each cycle are low. Most couples cannot afford to try for one month, much less for multiple times. Considering that it also costs a significant amount of money to adopt a baby, many couples opt for the "sure thing" rather then risking their money on much lower odds.
IVF is Physically Taxing
Undergoing IVF treatments is very rigorous. The woman must inject shots into her thigh daily to cause her ovaries to superovulate. The drugs used are very taxing on the woman, and they can cause her to be become extremely emotional.
IVF Raises Ethical Issues
Ironically, couples who undergo IVF to become parents may have to selectively abort one or more fetuses if multiple eggs are fertilized. Many couples cannot bring themselves to abort a baby when they have worked so hard to become parents. If the couple chooses not to selectively abort, they run the risk of multiple births.

Don't Offer Unsolicited Opinions If They Are Trying IVF
On the flip side of the coin, don't offer unsolicited advice to your friends who do choose to try IVF. For many couples, IVF is the only way they will ever give birth to a baby. This is a huge decision for them to make, for all of the reasons I outlined above.
If the couple has resolved any ethical issues, don't muddy the waters. IVF is a gray area in many ethical circles, and many of our moral leaders don't yet know how to answer the ethical questions that have arisen from this new technology. If the couple has resolved these issues already, you only make it harder by raising the ethical questions again. Respect their decision, and offer your support. If you can't offer your support due to ethical differences of opinion, then say nothing.
A couple who chooses the IVF route has a hard, expensive road ahead, and they need your support more than ever. The hormones are no cakewalk, and the financial cost is enormous. Your friend would not be going this route if there were an easier way, and the fact that she is willing to endure so much is further proof of how much she truly wants to parent a child. The hormones will make her more emotional, so offer her your support and keep your questions to yourself.

Don't Play Doctor
Once your infertile friends are under a doctor's care, the doctor will run them through numerous tests to determine why they aren't able to conceive. There a numerous reasons that a couple may not be able to conceive. Here are a few of them:
Blocked fallopian tubes
Cysts
Endometriosis
Low hormone levels
Low "normal form" sperm count
Low progesterone level
Low sperm count
Low sperm motility
Thin uterine walls

Infertility is a complicated problem to diagnose, and reading an article or book on infertility will not make you an "expert" on the subject. Let your friends work with their doctor to diagnose and treat the problem. Your friends probably already know more about the causes and solutions of infertility than you will ever know.
You may feel like you are being helpful by reading up on infertility, and there is nothing wrong with learning more about the subject. The problem comes when you try to "play doctor" with your friends. They already have a doctor with years of experience in diagnosing and treating the problem. They need to work with and trust their doctor to treat the problem. You only complicate the issue when you throw out other ideas that you have read about. The doctor knows more about the causes and solutions; let your friends work with their doctor to solve the problem.

Don't Be Crude
It is appalling that I even have to include this paragraph, but some of you need to hear this-Don't make crude jokes about your friend's vulnerable position. Crude comments like "I'll donate the sperm" or "Make sure the doctor uses your sperm for the insemination" are not funny, and they only irritate your friends.

Don't Complain About Your Pregnancy
This message is for pregnant women-Just being around you is painful for your infertile friends. Seeing your belly grow is a constant reminder of what your infertile friend cannot have. Unless an infertile women plans to spend her life in a cave, she has to find a way to interact with pregnant women. However, there are things you can do as her friend to make it easier.
The number one rule is DON'T COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR PREGNANCY. I understand from my friends that, when you are pregnant, your hormones are going crazy and you experience a lot of discomfort, such as queasiness, stretch marks, and fatigue. You have every right to vent about the discomforts to any one else in your life, but don't put your infertile friend in the position of comforting you.
Your infertile friend would give anything to experience the discomforts you are enduring because those discomforts come from a baby growing inside of you. When I heard a pregnant woman complain about morning sickness, I would think, "I'd gladly throw up for nine straight months if it meant I could have a baby." When a pregnant woman would complain about her weight gain, I would think, "I would cut off my arm if I could be in your shoes."
I managed to go to baby showers and hospitals to welcome my friends' new babies, but it was hard. Without exception, it was hard. Stay sensitive to your infertile friend's emotions, and give her the leeway that she needs to be happy for you while she cries for herself. If she can't bring herself to hold your new baby, give her time. She isn't rejecting you or your new baby; she is just trying to work her way through her pain to show sincere joy for you. The fact that she is willing to endure such pain in order to celebrate your new baby with you speaks volumes about how much your friendship means to her.

Don't Treat Them Like They Are Ignorant
For some reason, some people seem to think that infertility causes a person to become unrealistic about the responsibilities of parenthood. I don't follow the logic, but several people told me that I wouldn't ache for a baby so much if I appreciated how much responsibility was involved in parenting.
Let's face it-no one can fully appreciate the responsibilities involved in parenting until they are, themselves, parents. That is true whether you successfully conceived after one month or after 10 years. The length of time you spend waiting for that baby does not factor in to your appreciation of responsibility. If anything, people who have been trying to become pregnant longer have had more time to think about those responsibilities. They have also probably been around lots of babies as their friends started their families.
Perhaps part of what fuels this perception is that infertile couples have a longer time to "dream" about what being a parent will be like. Like every other couple, we have our fantasies-my child will sleep through the night, would never have a tantrum in public, and will always eat his vegetables. Let us have our fantasies. Those fantasies are some of the few parent-to-be perks that we have-let us have them. You can give us your knowing looks when we discover the truth later.

Don't Gossip About Your Friend's Condition
Infertility treatments are very private and embarrassing, which is why many couples choose to undergo these treatments in secret. Men especially are very sensitive to letting people know about infertility testing, such as sperm counts. Gossiping about infertility is not usually done in a malicious manner. The gossipers are usually well-meaning people who are only trying to find out more about infertility so they can help their loved ones.
Regardless of why you are sharing this information with someone else, it hurts and embarrasses your friend to find out that Madge the bank teller knows what your husband's sperm count is and when your next period is expected. Infertility is something that should be kept as private as your friend wants to keep it. Respect your friend's privacy, and don't share any information that your friend hasn't authorized.

Don't Push Adoption (Yet)
Adoption is a wonderful way for infertile people to become parents. (As an adoptive parent, I can fully vouch for this!!) However, the couple needs to work through many issues before they will be ready to make an adoption decision. Before they can make the decision to love a "stranger's baby," they must first grieve the loss of that baby with Daddy's eyes and Mommy's nose. Adoption social workers recognize the importance of the grieving process. When my husband and I went for our initial adoption interview, we expected the first question to be, "Why do you want to adopt a baby?" Instead, the question was, "Have you grieved the loss of your biological child yet?" Our social worker emphasized how important it is to shut one door before you open another.
You do, indeed, need to grieve this loss before you are ready to start the adoption process. The adoption process is very long and expensive, and it is not an easy road. So, the couple needs to be very sure that they can let go of the hope of a biological child and that they can love an adopted baby. This takes time, and some couples are never able to reach this point. If your friend cannot love a baby that isn't her "own," then adoption isn't the right decision for her, and it is certainly not what is best for the baby.
Mentioning adoption in passing can be a comfort to some couples. (The only words that ever offered me comfort were from my sister, who said, "Whether through pregnancy or adoption, you will be a mother one day.") However, "pushing" the issue can frustrate your friend. So, mention the idea in passing if it seems appropriate, and then drop it. When your friend is ready to talk about adoption, she will raise the issue herself.

So, what can you say to your infertile friends?

Unless you say "I am giving you this baby," there is nothing you can say that will erase their pain. So, take that pressure off of yourself. It isn't your job to erase their pain, but there is a lot you can do to lesson the load. Here are a few ideas.

Let Them Know That You Care
The best thing you can do is let your infertile friends know that you care. Send them cards. Let them cry on your shoulder. If they are religious, let them know you are praying for them. Offer the same support you would offer a friend who has lost a loved one. Just knowing they can count on you to be there for them lightens the load and lets them know that they aren't going through this alone.

Remember Them on Mother's Day
With all of the activity on Mother's Day, people tend to forget about women who cannot become mothers. Mother's Day is an incredibly painful time for infertile women. You cannot get away from it-There are ads on the TV, posters at the stores, church sermons devoted to celebrating motherhood, and all of the plans for celebrating with your own mother and mother-in-law.
Mother's Day is an important celebration and one that I relish now that I am a mother. However, it was very painful while I was waiting for my baby. Remember your infertile friends on Mother's Day, and send them a card to let them know you are thinking of them. They will appreciate knowing that you haven't "forgotten" them.

Support Their Decision to Stop Treatments
No couple can endure infertility treatments forever. At some point, they will stop. This is an agonizing decision to make, and it involves even more grief. Even if the couple chooses to adopt a baby, they must still first grieve the loss of that baby who would have had mommy's nose and daddy's eyes.
Once the couple has made the decision to stop treatments, support their decision. Don't encourage them to try again, and don't discourage them from adopting, if that is their choice. Once the couple has reached resolution (whether to live without children, adopt a child, or become foster parents), they can finally put that chapter of their lives behind them. Don't try to open that chapter again.

Audrey is very good at feeding herself now. But not so good at chewing before she swallows. And a few times...she's choked on her food. Occasionally she gets going too fast and takes too many bites at once and chokes. All the baby books warn about it, tell you what to do when it happens, not if it happens. Kids put things in their mouth and choke. Kids get hurt. It's a fact of life.

Just don't tell that to my husband.

Any time Audrey gets hurt, he panics. It's not pretty. The last time Audrey choked I patted her back, watched her closely, tried to keep her calm so she could swallow. Justin? Well, just picture him running around in the background with his hands in the air yelling like a crazy person. The other night when she was running in the dining room and slipped on the wood floor and hit her head he launched into a tirade about how we should have been watching her more closely. Even though we were both less than 5 feet away from her and we were watching her closely.

The fact that Justin is the parent who's freaking out about these small accidents surprises me a little. After all, I'm the one who was so nervous that we couldn't leave her with anyone else for over a year. I'm the one who marvels at everything she does and gushes on and on about her to anyone that will listen. Justin's never been the mushy-gushy, emotional type. But something about this little girl of ours has brought out the protector in him. When he gets so worried it just makes me smile (which does not make him happy) because it shows how much he loves her and wants to keep her safe.

I tell him, "it's going to happen", "kids get hurt", "she's exploring and testing boundaries, it's how she learns". And he says, "but she shouldn't get hurt" "it doesn't have to happen like that, we can prevent it". And to some extent, he's right. We are her parents and guardians and it's our job to prevent her from being hurt whenever we can. Most of the time I'm there to take the scissors or the permanent marker out of her hand, or to set her on the floor after she's climbed onto the dining room table, or to stop her from shoveling too much food into her mouth. But I am not all-seeing and all-knowing and I will not be able to protect her all of the time.

I know this because I was once a kid myself. I grabbed hot wire fences just to see what it felt like, fell off the back of my friend's bike and scraped my knees, and slammed my finger in a door so hard it tore off my nail and required stitches. I even drove a car into the side of my Grandpa's barn (but that's a story for another day). Justin, with his wild youth, should know about childhood scrapes and bruises better than anyone. I've heard countless stories about broken limbs and sports injuries and lawn darts. Even one that makes me shudder about shooting an arrow up into the air and running for cover.

It happens. It's part of growing up. And this tough, protective, new father is working on relaxing a little bit.


But I just know he's not going to take it well when she's older and some boy breaks her heart.


Good thing he doesn't own a gun.